We are approaching week three of having this sweet, little soul as a new member of our family. I'm SO in love!! I'm feeling better and better every day. I've really enjoyed taking it slow. And yet, there are times where I notice that in between the taking-it-slow moments, I've had this underlying feeling that I "should" be doing "something."
If I sit in silence for too long I start to stir. Here I am recovering from a cesarean birth and I have strict guidelines to follow. I can't drive for at least 3 weeks. I shouldn't hold or lift anything more than 10 lbs. I need to be careful bending over, turning, twisting and getting up. Even sneezing hurts. So jumping into my "normal" way of doing things wasn't about to happen the last few weeks.
Not only have I recognized my need to keep busy, but being home with my husband for the last three weeks has shown me my need for control. It has been a learning experience, especially the first week being home with our newborn. Both my husband and I are first borns, Capricorns and very independent. We've had to learn how to adjust to being in each other's space 24/7 and I've had to practice letting go of my need to have things done in a certain way. Ahhh....letting go is a daily practice isn't it!?
Ok...I surrender!
I rest. I nurse. I love my babes. I take it s l o w e r...
And as I observe my need for control, I'm reminded that when I jump fully into the creative process is when I feel the most light, happy and free. I'm in the mood to play and wrap my arms around the process again - that place where I create with no "right way" in mind, no expectations, no "to do's" or "should's," and no control of the outcome.
Creating to me is a great practice in surrender. That's why I've joined the Art Every Day Month challenge for the second time. Yet, I'm putting no pressure on myself to actually make art every day. My focus is still to rest, to go slow, and to bond with my babe. This challenge simply acts as a reminder that it's in the flow of creating that I am much more willing to let go, to love the moment, and to simply BE. And that is a daily practice worth embracing.
(BIG thank you to all of you for your love, support and beautiful comments on my birth story post. xoxo)
hello you! You amaze me with all that you manage to do and still blogging away! I relate to it though as I am a bit frenzied and a fellow capricorn.
ReplyDeleteI hope you are feeling better and stronger each day. Would love to do the art month project but have about to run my Journal Your Dreams workshop which I know will keep me super business amongst kids, house and MA - must be a little crazy, but I love the creativity and community so much.
Take care,
Amelia.x
Hi Amelia-
ReplyDeleteYou know what...I used to think I was crazy but now I just know that I'm happiest when I'm creatiing and connecting with community. So blogging and painting and being friends with lovely souls like you is a complete joy to me!
Your Journal workshop sounds AMAZING!!
xoxo